Almost the weekend!

Today we have a meeting with medicaid...should be loads of fun. NOT. Lots to do today, need to make sure everything is in for Derek to start college! No idea how I'll pay for it yet..

Still thinking about having a baby shower..I suppose it would be stress I don't need right now?

Yet, another article today on early puberty for girls. I've known about this since MacKenzie was little. We don't buy regular milk (we buy organic or Silk) and watch the meat intake. (really hard to do when you don't have money). All while given weird looks, and rolling of the eyes by family. This is ALL connected the chemicals in our environment, in our FOOD! We live in a toxic world, we need to do everything we can as parents to be aware of this. Fight and stand up for a better food system. The cancer rates are soaring (as we know all to well). Is everything about money. Why are things not done for benefiting man (and woman ;-) kind?? I know it would be more helpful and probably better for my sanity if I just didn't think about this. But, with children, what we are going through, and a NEW baby on the way, don't I owe it to my family?

Hey, this is super, went to the medicaid office, apparently they say we're not eligible for ANYTHING!!! REALLY??? Are you kidding me? So, a secret, apparently everyone else perhaps already knows...there is no middle. You either make alot of money and the appropriate insurance through your work. Or you make nothing and collect every sort of help there is. There is no middle. People who have the ability and desire to work and bring home some sort of paycheck....those people are not rewarded for their efforts. People who can't get out of the "pit"...people who don't work at all or do anything. THOSE people are helped. Ohhhhhhhh, the woes of our "system". Why is this how things are done? Who the heck is this REALLY supposed to benefit?? and where is the nearest bridge?? (she says only half kidding) So what?...no one really cares? That answer is very clear. What is this?...Let's see how much stress they can handle??

The picture I posted on the post is Danny making the pool a wave pool!! What you can't tell by the picture is how hard MacKenzie was laughing! My husbands grace and patience inspires me beyond words..it always has. Now more than ever though. (the picture is after the stressful meeting today.)

Mommie Blog

Well, I have to say, I wanted to start a new blog...a mommie blog. You know those ones where the stay at home mamma talks about her great kids all the time. Being pregnant at 38, with a 10 year old daughter and a soon to be 16 year old son. Thought it would be cool. You know being pregnant after basically 10 years of trying...or at least not, not trying, LOL. Six months pregnant a little nervous and quite irritated with family members who have paid absolutely no attention to the fact that we're pregnant. I had envisioned lovely luncheons and outings family calling me to do baby shopping and coffee...(decaf of course ;-) That of course, has yet to happen.

We've had major job and finance issues over the past year..LOL, longer I think. Seems to be one thing after another. But, nothing could have prepared me for what happened 2 days ago...we took my husband to the ER for what we thought was a hernia...it was not, we've been told he has lymphoma..they don't know what kind yet. More tests next week. How do you handle this? My husband who does everything for everybody..and asks nothing in return, my husband who is incredibly caring and sweet, who works out on a daily basis, not overweight, doesn't smoke...the words why and frankly "what the heck" come to mind. Not fair. Yes, yes, I know..that's what they say, life's not fair. Don't recall signing up for that?!

We have a positive attitude and outlook. (while of course being terrified). We have no insurance, very little money coming in...don't know whether to laugh or throw myself off a bridge at this point, LOL. We believe in the power of prayer..after all if more than 1 asks and asks together..He'll listen right?? So if you've read this far...(don't worry, I'm almost done ranting) Please pray for my husband, kids and maybe me if you have a minute. God hears us...I do prefer we be really LOUD though.

I didn't start this blog to whine..so don't be afraid to read again, started it to maybe keep myself sane during this awful time.